Mma News: Who's to blame for Boyle's distress?

Who's to blame for Boyle's distress?
Thursday, June 25, 2009

Who is responsible when reality TV contestants crack under the strain? It's easy to pick on the media or the shows' producers, but in my opinion a large part of the responsibility lies with us, the general public.

When Susan Boyle admitted herself to a clinic over the weekend, we saw the sour end of the misconceptions we hold about how to achieve happiness. We're clinging to two false beliefs, and they're leading us badly astray.

The first belief is that happiness comes from outward success, from a certain number of hits on YouTube or a fabulous salary. It doesn't. Watch Susan Boyle's initial performance on Britain's Got Talent again, because that's the one that really moved us all. When she's singing, she's singing because she
simply loves to sing. She hasn't yet thought much about what she'll "get" from her singing. You can hear that in her voice.

The second mistaken belief is that instant happiness is the same as lasting happiness.

Instant happiness disappears as quickly as it arrives, and it only leaves you wanting more. Lasting happiness, on the other hand, is a process, and it's that process rather than any resulting "reward" that creates happiness.

This can be particularly devastating when parents push their children to appear on these shows. Children are unlikely to understand fully what's happening, and if they don't win - and most won't - they often feel they've let their parents down. This can lead to low self-esteem and feelings of helplessness.

So, as we prepare for yet another series of Big Brother, should production companies take more care when it comes to selecting applicants? We expect psychological "experts" to assess in advance who can and can't cope with the stresses that sudden fame will bring. I think that's nonsense. No one - not even the candidates themselves - can know how they'll react to instant fame until they have it.

Contrary to what many think, psychologists don't have reliable tests or techniques that, in one interview, can predict how someone will react under very different circumstances in the future. Unless you establish a relationship with someone over a substantial period of time and in a number of different circumstances, there's little anyone can suggest about another person's ability to cope under enormous pressure. That's why I have repeatedly declined to participate in the selection procedures for reality TV.

No one can survive constant scrutiny without feeling stressed. We know from the laws of physics that even the tiniest particle is affected by being observed. So, the fault with reality TV? It lies largely within ourselves, with our desire for easy and instant answers.